Missed the bright light when the matches ignated.

Just cause you feel it, doesn't mean it's there...

2003-07-14T23:26:58Z

I hate it when people update a lot in one day. But the reason for the [now] multiple entries is that I don't have a computer at home [as i stated earlier probably], so while I'm checking my mail, I thought to fill out a silly survey cuz they're oh so summer boredom.

[stolen from olivia]

10 things i love
10_Smoothies.
09_My pink collared shirt.
08_My friends.
07_Adrienne's ring...or should I say MY ring.
06_Designing clothes.
05_Pouty lips.
04_The Roxy.
03_The Stare. <3
02_My bed.
01_Possibilites.

09 things i hate
09_WhEn PeOpLe TyPe LiKe ThIs
08_Everyone in photo except for Mindy, Olivia, Kristin, Ryan, Jon, Colby, Cambria, Tamal, and Molly.
07_My life. [so blunt I am]
06_The death of Seymour. :( I have to replace him soon...Petco trip? Anyone?
05_Any drug other than heroin.
04_Sluts. Not sleazes...but sluts.
03_Local bands.
02_People with really big smiles...especially when they're gums show. ew.
01_Bikes. haha.

08 things i miss
08_My innocence.
07_Telling the truth.
06_Samantha Smith and Roya Waltman
05_TMS boys.
04_My grandma.
03_Santa Monica.
02_Being active at school.
01_Smoking...sometimes.

07 things i can't live without
07_Food.
06_Espresso.
05_My friends.
04_Taxi.
03_Mirrors...wow that sounded vain..but really, imagine a life w/o a mirror.
02_My family.
01_Nail polish.

06 things I want to do eventually
06_Get the Stare up and running.
05_Get away from HB.
04_Own an all white studio with large windows.
03_Get married and have attractive children.
02_Become a psychiatrist specializing in drug addictions.
01_Try heroin.

05 songs i will never get sick of
05_Rapture-Blondie
04_La la love you-The Pixies
03_Walk on the Wild Side-Velvet Underground
02_Green Plastic Trees-Radiohead
01_Specialist-Interpol

04 words that describe me
04_blunt
03_witty
02_giggly
01_jealous

03 things i want to change
03_My procrastination.
02_My jealously.
01_The world. All of it.

02 people i admire / adore
02_Robert Kennedy.
01_James Dean.

01 thing i cherish
01_Contentness...is that a word. Aww hell, it is now.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

la la la.

2003-07-07T04:30:27Z

Below is the "BIO" page of Ale's Site. I have yet to give it to Brett to put it on the site, cuz I haven't talked to Brett yet and I still don't have his pictures scanned. But I wanted my lj friends to see it and if you like what you see [or if you think he's a complete italian loser, which is some days] please tell me so I can send you a demo.

Vital Stats

Full Name: Alessandro Nunzio Randazzo

Birthday: The 8th of October 1986

Birth Place: Brooklyn, NY

Musical Influences: Bob Dylan, Blues, and Country

Favorites

Favorite color: “Brown. I love the color brown so much.”

Favorite ice cream flavor: “Vanilla with vanilla beans, I like the real stuff.”

Favorite T.V. show: Simpsons. I also really like the History Channel…a lot.

Favorite Venue: Mrs. Vander Burgh’s first period poetry slam, in which I won.

Favorite city: San Francisco.

Favorite food: Belgium waffles.

Brief Interview by Gypsy

How did you start playing folk music?
“I was in a band and the creative limits were too restricting. I got very depressed so I bought a $10 guitar at the swap meet and a tape recorder and messed around for a couple weeks. After my lost weeks playing and recording I found the song “Modesto” on the tape and fell in love with a new type of sound I had created or stole.”

How did you come up with your song titles?
“Basically I analyze the song and try to find hidden meaning then I give up and make up some ridiculous title.”

Did you ever actually go to Modesto?
“I passed through here on my way to San Francisco. I like the city’s name because it sounded Western and reminded me of American Graffiti.”

If you were an animal what would you be?
“Pigeon…I’m dirty.”

Deserted island, three things?
“1. Angelina Jolie. 2. Ok Computer [vinyl]. 3. A raft--oh oh, but make sure it isn’t discovered till after I have my way with Angelina Jolie.”

One wish in life, what would it be?
“Not watch any friends or family die.”

What are your plans for the future?
“Get married and own a house.”

What is happiness?
“Being a grandma with a warm gun.”

all.my.affection.
christina t.

anywherebuthb @ 2003-07-06T19:21:00

2003-07-07T02:29:50Z

I have a new livejournal.

Please add me: such_a_conquest

It's not completey ready yet due to the fact that I still need to scan an original photo of mine for the background, but it's friends only, so you might as well add me now.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

Living in danger and sleeping with strangers...

2003-06-25T20:38:45Z

Well I'll be dying at 24. See, see, you don't believe in God...he/she comes back for you. Ah well. Since I'm dying so young, drugs, booze, sex anyone? Might as well live it up eh?

I have never been a fan of weather really. People keep talking about how "beautiful" today is. I don't really see sunshine as beautiful. There's probably something wrong with me.

Photo was lovely today. I got in the most awkward places and suffered conditions to get some wonderful shots. Ex. I climbed these HUGE tires and crept behind them while M squared took pictures and then I layed on top of Molly's 20348029384039 degree car. Practically burned my skin off. But I love that class and I love the people in there. Like yesterday Cambria and I talked about clothes and movies for an extensive time. We made fun of those velour/terry jumpsuits and said how amazing Donnie Darko and Zoolander are. Oh how I adore her. And of course M squared [Molly and Mindy] are always fun and we enjoy taking "sleazy" pictures.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
This is the last Public entry. Yes, yes, I know, I know, I have always been a firm believer against Friends Only. But I figure my lj friends are the only people who comment on my lj yet I KNOW tons of other people read it even though they don't comment. I'll probably post the occasional entry with pictures public or something, it's just I don't want to feel censored anymore.

You do it to yourself, just you...

2003-06-23T03:42:25Z

Today I spent my day reincarnating my love for old c.d.s. I went through my sister's music from when she was my age and had a lovely day reading and listening to Depeche Mode, The Police, and Pet Shop Boys. I think I have found a balance between being alone and being involved. I find myself alone a lot recently, in activity and in silence. And it really is such a comfort to be completey free of thought. I'm going to start meditating again and try to completey clear my mind. Keefer and I talked about this before, she has only once been able to completey clear her mind. I wish to accomplish such an achievement soon. I'm very wrapped up in the books I'm reading. Everything from romantic comedies to Salinger to some Woody Allen. I really do appreciate the company of others. When I'm with you, I really do enjoy you. I'd like you to know that because I know I can be very unappreciative of my friends, and I don't mean to. The ideals of society and an oppressed adolescent's perceptions of these ideals seem to come out in the things I say and do, and I don't want my words or actions to come off sincere. I hope I can keep this new found balance for a while. I really really hope I can. Because instability scares me oh so much. I have been looking through my sister's psychiatry books and the more I know about disorders, the more I think I have them all. Sometimes my own thoughts seem to scare me the most. Which is why I'm making a conscious decision to deflate these thoughts.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
Rachel is coming over soon to watch Radiohead $2 Bill. I can't stop smiling.

Love...love will tear us apart...

2003-06-22T01:19:15Z

I got a digital camera.
It's not that great granted my parents got it for free at some conference.
But hell, it's still amusing.
My dad gave me his old camera.
So I'm using it for photo.
I like it better than my digital.
But I sort of already broke it.
Oops.

Yesterday I had a lovely day.
Lauren O. and I went to Savers, K-mart, Taco Bell, and the park.
We both got some splendid things.
And had wonderful conversations.
And sang the pixies.
And swung on swings.

The day before yesterday was nice as well.
You can see mindy's livejournal for pictures and details.
http://www.livejournal.com/users/play_tragic

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
poder and I realized something cool about our band:
m.pod
c.taj
l.kee
l.one
s.smi

All [well sam's sounds sketchy] sound really net with the inital of the first name and the first three letters of the last. ::clears throat:: I mean we pay attention in photo...

You'll be selling lemonade to the over paid...

2003-06-20T19:40:30Z

Ale called me last night and we talked for a few hours. He's in New York and was telling me all about it. We kept getting giddy and exclaiming how I should be there right now instead of here. He told me to prostitute my body for a few days to get money for a ticket and visit him. I think I will.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

schmeh.

2003-06-19T00:19:23Z

anywherebuthb
Magic Number	5
Job	Writer
Personality	Vicarious
Temperament	Sweet Natured
Sexual	If I Have To
Likely To Win	A Free Coke
Me - In A Word	Ditsy
Colour
Brought to you by MemeJack

Sweet Natured? haha.

I'm having a bad day.

But the Stills came out with their ep...so ::half smile::

all.my.affection.
christina t.

I am too cold for you...

2003-06-18T00:26:10Z

Good News:
*Got Coachella pictures back

Bad News:
*Most of the coachella pictures did not turn out because I, being the complete idiot I am, didn't have a great camera

Good News:
*I'm taking photo in summer school and I think it will be fun because I made more friends and have Poder

Bad News:
*I have to wake up at 6:30

Good News:
*I'm in the mood to hang out with friends

Bad News:
*No one calls me haha I'm not in complete exile kids!

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
I got a haircut. The new user pic is it.

bye bye love...

2003-06-15T17:37:53Z

When I grow up I have decided I'm going to become a psychiatrist specializing in drug addictions. When you have all ruined your lives on cocaine and heroin, I'll help you get things back together. Of course, I'll have to "confiscate" the drugs...but trust me, it will be in your own benefit.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
oh i'm sorry this is a very unusal entry...here's a typical summer entry:

monday
blah blah got drunk blah blah blah

tuesday
blah blah hung out with so and so blah blah blah

wednesday
blah blah I love penis blah blah blah

People are silly. Some [emphasis on the word some] entries get worst in the summer to read.

if you're frustrated then go...

2003-06-14T16:42:41Z





	
	
	
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How compatible with me are YOU?

mr. you're on fire mr....

2003-06-08T17:25:39Z

I'm a studying machine!

Well sort of.

When I actually sit down.

Turn down my music.

I actually learn stuff.

Well there's still a lot to learn.

My house is a zoo.

We have construction workers in here like it's nobody's business.

They bring their families.

I practiced Spanish with one of their three year old daughters.

Her name was Angela.

She dyed her hair auburn.

She's three.

My parents are going to buy me a new tv.

It's silver with a dvd player and vcr.

It's 24 inches.

My favorite number.

I think my mom and I are throwing my sister a surprise party.

A bunch of medical students in our house.

I can invite friends.

So it will be a bunch of medical students in the living room discussing arteries.

And a bunch of juvenile delinquents in my room discussing sex and drugs and rockn'roll.

I love Lauren O. and Mindy P.

That is all for today.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

momentary break from nervousness.

2003-06-06T04:35:12Z

I took a quiz [which i got from counting down] about what cities you belong in or something. Here's my list:

1.Manhattan, New York
2.Rochester, New York
3.Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
4.Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
5.Lexington, Kentucky
6.Columbus, Ohio
7.New York City, New York
8.Long Island, New York
9.Carlisle, Pennsylvania
10.Altoona, Pennsylvania
11.Indianapolis, Indiana
12.Minneapolis-St Paul, Minnesota
13.Toledo, Ohio
14.Nashville, Tennessee
15.Erie, Pennsylvania
16.Detroit, Michigan
17.Louisville, Kentucky
18.Richmond, Virginia
19.Syracuse, New York
20.Buffalo, New York
21.Reading, Pennsylvania
22.Lancaster, Pennsylvania
23.Manchester, New Hampshire
24.Nashua, New Hampshire

all.my.affection.
christina t.

it's killing us kids...

2003-06-05T04:44:04Z

Ten things that make me smile:
10. Talbert kids
9. espresso
8. paul banks
7. collages
6. toes
5. dasani water
4. mindy poder
3. haircuts
2. collared shirts
1. p.e.

Nine things that make me mad:
9. No Beck for me this summer. :(
8. Flakes
7. Narcissim
6. Egos
5. Finals
4. SAT
3. Humans
2. Birds
1. Enon playing on Friday @ the hob...me not going cuz of finals!

Eight things I couldn't live without:
8. Espresso
7. Honeydew
6. Good people
5. Taxi
4. My parents
3. Maria Andersson
2. My livejournal
1. My bed

Seven people I am thankful for:
7. Caitlin
6. Michelle
5. RYAN FIELD <3 <3
4. Rachel
3. Lara
2. Sierra
1. Mindy

Six things I want to accomplish before I die:
6. Actually decide on names for my childrens because I already have too many ideas.
5. Get the Stare up and running.
4. Make Ale rich and famous...thus making me rich and famous
3. Live in an all white studio with big windows
2. Get over my fear of small confined places
1. Fly.

Five things I am wearing right now:
5. Argoyl socks
4. Black yoga pants
3. Black polo like shirt
2. Bra
1. Underwear

Four things I want to do today:
4. Spanish oral...more like have to
3. Fix my nails
2. Have a dance party in my room...alone
1. Take a shower...ah yes the simple things.

Three things on my mind:
3. Spanish project.
2. my new bag.
1. Finals.

Two things I wish I had:
2. Independence.
1. Morals.

One thing I love:
1. Meditating.

So basically I'm like this neurotic 5'3 form of human right now cuz of finals and all the other worries I--well--worry about. I've been sleeping for only a few hours every night and am really quiet and can only think about coffee. I'm turning into a Requiem for a Dream character...just replace the drugs with espresso. I just spent the last two hours @ www.karmaloop.com and listened to enon and had a few shots of espresso, so I'm feeling a little better. But I just wanted to fill out another survey...because they make me smile.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

shakedown...

2003-06-01T05:08:13Z

Today was a wonderful day.

I woke up early in the morning [8 a.m.] and woke up the lovely Mindy Poder and we went to the beach [gasp]. We did a beach clean up which basically was us picking up cigarette butts for two hours because it was national no tobacco day. I ended up filling my bag up quick cuz i kept picking up 20 oz beer cans. Mindy and I had wonderful discussions under the pier. <3 A couple other kids were there and we would take many breaks and just sit on the sand.

Then Poder and I got jambas [yumm] and came back to the pier and asked if we could help with the no cigarrette fair thing to get our full community service credit for the year. So we end up asking people if they wanted to fill out surveys. I felt like one of those jesus freaks on the pier with the god-awful pictures of "supposed abortion" and stuff. Anyway, we surveyed people, people such as Debi [last name here cuz i don't remember it]. Debi is the lady from those anti-smoking commercials that has the hole in her neck. She really does sound and look the way she does in the commercials. It kinda shook me up.

Then some horrible bands played. Good lord. Horrible. I mean, bleh, just horrible. I referred to them as "all american rejects rejects." It was a definte comedic high.

Then we walked around the fair and got free stuff like these tiny nifty radios. They're the shit. Mindy and I are gonna become secret agents for this organization! All we have to do is walk in a store and see if they'll let us buy cigarettes...$5 a store, 20 stores a day...you do the math kid.

In the afternoon I came home and walked around my neighborhood peacefully listening to my new cool portable radio. And then I picked up Mindy again and we went to CPK's @ Fashion Island for dinner. Company: Megan Gorey, Christopher Bumcrot [long time no see], and Michelle Tran. It was quite a random group but a good one. Megan wanted the waiter, she couldn't stop talking about how hot the waiter was. We laughed a lot and made Christopher feel awkward--it's what we do best.

And now I'm home alone and have been for the past couple hours and am loving it. Sure I have tons of stuff to do and tons of upcoming events to worry about, but hell, all I can think about right now is sitting here, drinking water, watching good will hunting, and talking to mindy on aim. Oh greatest thing of the night:

Nicole is amazing. The girl made like four or five different pictures like that. She's so clever and I love her.

Overall, a serene wonderful day spent with a serene and wonderful girl [poder].

all.my.affection.
christina t.

post script.
I made a new friendster:
first name: jamba
last name: juice

Friendster of the century kids.

silly.

2003-05-31T03:52:03Z

top five places of the moment...
1. house of blues [anaheim]
2. my bedroom
3. my neighborhood
4. Lauren Keefer's house...it's just always so comfortable
5. the shower

top five bands/groups/artists of the moment...
1. interpol
2. the rapture
3. the sounds
4. the stills
4.5 cat power
4.6 the libertines
5. idlewild
what? I’m indecisive.

top five people of the moment...
1. Schmindy
2. Nicole
3. Sierra/Yvonne [I’m counting them as a unit.]
4. Natalie Chernus
5. Jon Kelsey

last cigarette: couple months ago
last car ride: about an hour ago…and I drove.
last good cry: Monday.
last book read: The Metamorphosis
last cuss word uttered: fuck
last beverage drank: smoothie.
last phone call: Lauren O.
last shoes worn: mary janes
last cd played: mix made by michelle
last item bought: book [Profiles in Courage]
last annoyance: not being able to see the pattern L
last disappointed: darling, I’m always disappointed
last key used: the one to the camry
last word spoken: “I can’t see you” to my sister [it’s dark in this room]
last sleep: woke up around 7 today, went to bed around 1…so like 6 hours.
last time amused: Sierra’s im.
last time hugged: Mindy or Jacquelyn
last time resentful: My entire existence is a resentment.
last shirt worn: pink collared shirt under black v-neck sweater
last time dancing: I am always dancing…no really…I dance around at school in front of large groups of “waiting to pounce/judge” adolescene…I dance in the hallway of my house…I dance in the car…I’m a dancing machine. Wow I’m weird.
last show attended: Coachella…aw yea.
last webpage visited: www.melodynelson.com

all.my.affection.
christina t.

we've been talking on the phone for hours and hours...

2003-05-30T01:03:46Z

I just got the new Rolling Stone today...

With the exception of like two article...

All I have to say is...

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!

all.my.affection.
christina t.

If you're frustrated then go...

2003-05-29T00:00:24Z

Instead of typing up the journal entry I wrote last night...
Or telling you about cute DMV boy which I idiotically did not do anything about...
Or describing my complex emotional turmoil...

This entire entry shall be dedicated to MISS MEGAN JOYCE GOREY!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY x 30472390472938742983!!!!

This girl is incredible. Infuckingcredible. She took me out on a date to Basilicios and even paid for me. She says she's obsessed with me and basically can cheer me up anytime I'm even remotely down. She and I have lots of things in common: similar taste in music [pattern? saturday?], feel uncomfortable around people we don't know, are members of the GGG, and share a love for the 80s. Megan is the type of person you'd be lucky to be friends with. She doesn't show up at school very much but when she does she makes that day better. I love you her oh so very much and hope she has a day just as wonderful as she is.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

the cat.

2003-05-26T23:21:34Z

I had the most bizarre experience just a few minutes ago. I was taking another well needed walk in my neighborhoods. And let me take a moment just to explain to you how serene and peaceful these walks are. I'm away from my parents, my school, my friends, my image, my narcissim, my ego, and my insecurities. I was walking along and this cat walked by me and I ignored it, being the anti pet person that I am. Then later as I'm on the other side of the culvesac [sorry sp] this cat comes walking straight towards me. And for some pecuilar reason I just found so much compassion in me for this orange and white cat. It didn't purr or do the typial meow, but it sounded like it was quacking almost. Now I know nothing of cats, but is that normal? Anyways, this cat just started circling me and getting it's white hair all over my black pants and I just find that so symbolic because recently I've been searching for something pure to attempt to cover my personal evil. So I decide I enjoy the company of this cat and I end up petting it and the cat ends up laying on the cement. And I kneel down next to the cat and the cat just rolls back and forth for a good five minutes around this newspaper continuning with the duck sounds. And gets up everytime I show signs of getting up. I start to walk away feeling renewed and the cat follows me and I look back with a smile because how often to cats follow me right? So then I start walking back, constantly looking back to see it there and occasionally have to make that kiss noise to keep it from getting distracted. But then I don't know what happenend but we just seemed to drift. I looked back and the cat was a lot farther now and he wasn't following me anymore. And I felt so hopeless because it seems like I can never keep anything/anyone interested in me for too long. So I continue walking, thinking to myself how silly I am and how I'm superior to this stupid cat and after I'm a good ten houses away from the cat I look back and it's gone.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

i think you're young without youth...

2003-05-25T00:46:50Z

Short angry lj entry as follows:

I think Interpol was made to come on earth and upset me. Good lord will I ever see them? I mean seriously, this is getting depressing, how many times have they come to LA and I not been able to see them? How many? Well let me tell you!

*The Henry Fonda Theatre [twice]
*Coachella [2nd day]
*Festival in Reno [they cancelled it]
*San Diego

And now Carlos is dj-ing at Bang on June 14th with the rest of the band and can I go? Fucking no because I'm not 18. Which brings me to my next points: I need a fake i.d. and I really should be 18. I mean a couple years older and I could legally continue my addiction to nicotine and move out and vote and you know etc etc. Grrr. Megan said she wanted to get fake i.d.'s, I think we should. It's not even like we want to use them to get drugs or drinks. We're not even into that stuff...that much. Hell, we're just two girls looking to dance around to good music with good people. Now let me ask you, is that so much to ask?

all.my.affection.
christina t.

catch up on your sleep...

2003-05-23T21:09:21Z

I've decided I'm going to spend the entire summer dancing.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

you make me lose my buttons...

2003-05-23T02:34:12Z

May is such a suicidal month. Have you thought about it? School is almost over and the months of May are filled with the stress of finals and attempts of raising grades that have completey fallen due to the lack of motivation throughout the year. Also May is just suicidal because everyone finds themselves almost half way through the year with accomplishments equaling zero. It's almost summer and nothing has changed. By May, you seriously begin to hate everyone. Let's face it, who's exciting or even original anymore? May makes people feel drained and upset and apprehensive of the future months to come. Or, hell, it's probably just me.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

My Crazy Pete.

2003-05-21T05:31:21Z

There is this man who rides his bike around my neighborhood at night. He reminds me of Crazy Pete from Now & Then. However, my Crazy Pete's bike is far more remarkable because it is covered in neon lights and is fully equipped with a radio. Tonight, as I was walking up to my porch, I see him ride by with Weezer's "Hash Pipe" blazing from his radio. In a world of horrible things and people I don't like, this man makes everything seem alright. Recently, I find myself waking up, but for no reason. That's a horrible feeling that I would never wish upon you. But unfortunately, I feel very hopeless. I just have too many things on my mind. It's ubelievable. I wish I could wear a t-shirt that says "I'm depressed. Stay away," but until the Gap comes out with one in black, I'm expected to always keep a smile and say hello.
The weather has been so strange lately. At night, this dense fog covers suburban Huntington Beach. This fog scares me. I feel as though I'm in a scary movie, however, I don't play the main character. I'm not the heroine who runs away from the monster or even trys to fight it. I'm that minor role in the beginning who just sits back and let's the monster corrupt/kill her and then mysteriously comes back in the sequel. No explanation, no fight.
I've been taking really long blinks recently. They feel like the equivalence of a sigh, but there is no use for one's breath. I think these blinks bring me closer to a place I'd rather be. I'm even considering giving into my parent's request for a psychiatrist simply because I just CAN'T confide in anyone else. I figure an individual with the ability to give me antidepressants is the right person to open up to.
Anyways, the thesis of my entry is that this man is a complete stranger to me. I don't know his name, his address, his favorites, or his story, but , for some reason, completey unknown, I feel closer to him than I do anyone else. Seeing and hearing this mystery man ride by my house inspires me to wake up in the mornings just to search for more amazing sights like him.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

i'm going on a vacation...

2003-05-20T23:39:30Z

I just wanted to thank Katia Hadj-Hammou in this livejournal entry. She is just an amazing person. She read my lj a while back with the list of things I live for and one of the things said letters. The girl wrote me this incredibly sweet letter and drew me a picture. Thank you so much Katia for remebering little things like how I like Andy Kaufman. I've been having a god awful day and the letter completey made up for all of it. I'm sorry we haven't been hanging out very much, it's my own personal fault. I'm an idiot. It's really that simple. But, I'm coming to see what is important in my life, and what friends are true, and I'm pretty sure you are one of them.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

it's the year to be hated...

2003-05-17T05:25:52Z

Oh man, I just saw such an incredibly, cheesy, yet so incredibly wonderful movie. DOWN WITH LOVE. I went with Michelle Tran and Mindy Poder. Man o man, go see it. I don't care what your taste in movies in, I mean, come one who doesn't like the 60s and the battle of the sexes. If Mindy, Michelle, and I can agree on something it must be stupendous. Anyway, the actual experience of hanging out tonight sucked, cuz my mom is just such an ass about this whole me losing the trust stuff. Mamma mia, one minute she exclaims how proud she is of me and my accomplishments and how I'm becoming a better person, and then she turns around 360 and all of a sudden all I hear is "no, no, no" She's insane. Tonight she spied on me to make sure I went to the movies and not somewhere else. YES! Spied! Anyways, I just keep reminding myself just a few more months till I get a license and just a few more years before moving out. My life resembles that of Laine Kim on Gilmore Girls [shout out to the GGG] and we all know that Laine has the pleasure of THE dave grubowski...so I'm just waiting to find Dave and when I do, these years of maternal strictness will all be worth it. I sound like such a dork, see kids, this is what romantic comedies do to ya.

I've been feeling really low recently. My life is never at a balance, aspects of my life are either extremely high or extremely low. I never have a medium range lifestyle. This whole regaining the parental units trust thing/bringing up my grades thing is suffering my relationships with friends and such. I feel completey and utterly out of everything. I mean, jesus christ, I look away for a couple weeks and bam! relationships made and broken, people best friends and worst enemies, and here I am in the midst of all this confusion and always the last to know about everything! Me?! Miss Know Everyone's Shit. Hey man, it was the only title I lawfully won and now I don't even have that. And the sad part is is I don't even know if I even want to incorporate myself back into the whole social scene. I realized I'm a bitch. I mean sincerely man, I'm a bitch. Like wow, I'm mean. haha. And I don't even say this for sympahty or for things like "oh gosh christina you're like the nicest person ever." Cuz man, I sure am not. And I'm fine with it. I think my experiences with being mean to people provides me with the ability to move on from past obstacles.

To create a complete and utter reversal, I'd like to take this time to simply appreciate some people in my life that I really never appreciate. First, we have ALESSANDRO RANDAZZO...I know you think I'm mean to you sometimes, but it's never in anyway intentional. Your ego and your narcissim drive me crazy, but I've realized I don't want to be driven crazy by anyone but you. And really you are one of the few people who I'll probably keep on contact with, cuz we'll end up living in the same city...both probably addicted to something(s). Secondly we have MEGAN GOREY...man, this girl, woowee. You say you're obsessed with me and basically make me blush all the time, but in reality you are one of the best things about this ugly place. I can't think of a topic we don't agree on and well you've even taken me out to dinner before! I need you more than I need...dare I say it...Gilmore Girls. ::gasp::

That's all for yet another extremely long and babbling livejournal entry.

all.my.affection.
christina t.

Happy Deathday!
Your name:	anywherebuthb
You will die on:	Sunday, May 22, 2011
You will die of:	Smote by God
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